what am I made of??
A lot more than I thought apparently. Yesterday was a test of physical strength but I think it was more of a test of mental strength. I had a 5 mile run on my calendar for the day and also what i thought would be a leisurly paddling ride down wekiva springs. I figured no problem I'll just run after the paddling trip.
Our "leisurly" paddling trip ended up being 7 hours long with about 5 of those paddling and the other 2 just enjoying the river (but outside nonetheless). Our group leader wanted to go upstream since they opened up a new section of the river so the first 2 hours was going upstream and back. The second half of the day was a more than 6 mile paddle downriver with about a 1/2 mile of turning around and going back for a lost kayaker.... yeah.
Throughout the whole trip I was more and more convinced the 5 mile run just wasn't happening. I was physically exhausted. By the time we got back to the dock I had myself convinced I was going home, eating a giant bowl of pasta and then taking a nap and seeing what i felt like in a few hours. I couldn't imagine doing anything else.
Then something weird happened on the way home. I went from wondering if I was going to do my run at all to wanting to just do it right away and get it over with. I knew if I went home and sat down I wasn't getting up again. My entire upper body was aching, and my entire body was just.... tired. I got home and ate 1/2 a bag of sharkies energy gummies, filled up my water belt with ice water and headed out.
The entire drive to the trail I just kept telling myself "I realize this will suck, it's 88 degrees outside, feels hotter, and I'm exhausted... but this is not a test of physical strength but mental strength." I stopped looking at it as a run and more of just an hour of mental conditioning. How long can I stand something miserable? An hour? That's all I'd need....
The run DID suck. It was hot. I was tired... but I wasn't really focused on that. I was focused on my body. How strong my body actually was physically. How strong I was mentally. I didn't even allow myself to wipe the sweat off my face because this was a test of mental strength and sweat running down my face annoys the hell out of me so what better way to test mental strength right?? lol. By the time it got to my lips I licked it up and thought "yay.... I'm recycling electrolytes". Yeah go ahead, call my gross. I like to think of it as "efficient".
Finished the run, faster than most of my other 5 mile runs. Went home, ate, and crashed. Today I feel like a dump truck ran over me yesterday. I have to run 3.5 miles at some point today. Not sure how that will go. Maybe that'll be a test of my ability to just go slow and take things easy. Who knows. It'll get done though, I know that.
I am Lauren, hear me roar!
image from: http://www.firehow.com/images/stories/users/80/heat-exhaustion.jpg